Friday, October 30, 2009

ongoing THEFT continues....

Please write to  and complain about the outright theft of dozens of posts from here ( and from, all of which are being stolen by the ironically named which is entirely composed of stolen material.   Fair indeed.

Thieves have been vanquished.  Thanks for your help.

Sunday, October 25, 2009


Thieves have been vanquished.  Thanks for your help. 




Theft info update

Thieves have been vanquished.  Thanks for your help. 

Here is the correct address to complain to.  Godaddy sold them the domain but does not host the site and doesn't care what's on it.
If you support and read and enjoy my blog, please write to the hosting company at and let them know the fairweightloss site needs to be pulled.

 Previous post

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Gym room is done! no more excuses! (post is restored

Here are the pictures of Rosie's gym room, before and after. A few details aren't done yet, but it's at about 95%! Yay!
This is a stitch of what the room looked like before.  All white, lots of small windows--10 feet across the front, 6 feet across the left and 1 window to the right.

The Microsoft stitch program didn't seem to understand how to stitch together the after pics. So you will have to puzzle them out. My Photoshop skills don't help with this.

It's pouring rain today. There aren't really any lights in the room, because of all the windows. So with the windows open, the windows are good and the rest of the room is dark. With the shades closed and the light on, everything's dark. Sorry about that.  The room only has 3 walls--it used to be a porch--the 4th wall is just two built-in bookcases to either side--and you can see the edge of my desk against the back of the left bookcase.
In my new 10'x6' (60 sf) gym (the whole house is only 900 sf)I've got a Bowflex, a stair machine, resistance bands, a round balance thing, hand weights with handles that function as kettle bells, a yoga ball and yoga mat (not everything is in the room yet).  My computer is close enough that I can move the screen and play workout videos (or music). The cats have a cat bed and their favorite stool (which just happens to match the curtains and paint) so they can hang out with me. And my plants are LOVING the light! .
I already did a short workout on the stair machine, which I haven't used for years.   I should go hop on it for another one.  NO MORE EXCUSES--the equipment is RIGHT NEXT TO ME!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009


Thank you, John, for letting me know that FAIRWEIGHTLOSS.COM is blatantly stealing every bit of my content--as well as the content of the blog Thoughts by Kim --and posting it as their own.
Here is all the contact information of the plagiarizers.  Feel free to send them hate mail and sign them up for spam, I don't care, whatever makes them take down the stolen info.

10643 Navigation Dr

Rivervie, Florida 33569
United States

Registered through:, Inc. (
Created on: 01-Oct-09
Expires on: 01-Oct-10
Last Updated on: 01-Oct-09

Administrative Contact:
Gibbs, Marvin
10643 Navigation Dr
Rivervie, Florida 33569
United States
(813) 850-5546

Technical Contact:
Gibbs, Marvin
10643 Navigation Dr
Rivervie, Florida 33569
United States
(813) 850-5546

I put a lot of thought and effort into my writing.  I want to preserve my thoughts and motivate others.  It hurts me to think that someone else would just take everything I've done and repost it word-for-word, including graphics, as their own.
Thieves have been vanquished.  Thanks for your help. 

If you do email ipower, please cc or bcc me wholelottarosieyoung at yahoo dot com.
Below is a shrunk-down screenprint showing that EVERY post on that page was taken from my blog or the other lady's.   They even used her personal photos of her and her husband!   Insane.  


Tuesday, October 20, 2009

The Cult of Can't

I was changing in a cubicle at the pool today when a lady came in who I have never seen before, and I've been going there for years.   She started talking to another lady about how she wanted to come in every day, "But I can't."  My thought was, "what's stopping you?" and in fact the other lady asked something very much like that.  The woman could have said, "I don't have bus fare.  I don't own a car.  My husband is sick and needs me home."  A dozen reasons why a person really might not be able to make it.  Her reason? "I just can't."
My grandmother is a leading member of the Cult of Can't.  It drives me and my mom CRAZY.  She is 92 (Grandma, not Mom) and she "can't" do anything.  "Come have lunch with us." "I can't sit in the car for that long."  "Come out on the deck" "I can't climb the step" or "I can't bear the heat" or "I can't bear the cold."  She has made up her own set of rules, all revolving around what she CAN'T do, and every day her world shrinks a little more because she CAN'T do anything. 
Are there things I can't do?  Certainly.  I can't run a marathon.   I can't stand on my head.  I can't speak a foreign language.  But I don't define myself by what I can't do.   I can run in the pool for over an hour so that's what I do--I don't worry that on land I "can't" run that far or fast.  I "can't" fit into my size 4 Levi's anymore.   Maybe someday I will fit in them again.  Or I will buy new Levi's in a proper size and look awesome in them. 
I used to think a lot more about the evil "can't" and it really sends a person into a downward spiral.   It spreads from the specific to the general and before you know it, you CAN'T get out of bed because you CAN'T walk anymore.  I refused, I still refuse, to allow myself to get to that point.  My grandmother is heading straight down that road and is going to end up in an ugly nursing home rather than living with my mom--because it will get to the point where my mother can't take care of her anymore.    My poor mom did 4 years of caretaking for my dad when he was dying, and he had just gotten moved into the nursing home (where he died 2 months later) when Grandma packed her bags and moved herself in.  That was a rare time when my mom should have used can't--"I can't take you in, Mom" but she didn't.  And now she is a caretaker for another person who can't do anything.  My dad was really sick and he still tried to do things, mowing the lawn & taking out the trash.  My grandmother only has high blood pressure but she's practically made herself bedridden over CAN'T.
A while ago in a seminar I learned about the phrase "have to"  which is a cousin to can't and often rides in the same car.  "I can't go because I have to clean the cat box."
When you speak, and think, don't use "can't".  Don't use "have to".  "I choose not to go because I choose to clean the litter box."  Ah, that opens it right up doesn't it? 
You can argue (I tried to) that the cat box needs to be cleaned.  Or you need to get to work to keep your job to keep getting paid.  But it's a choice.  You can clean the cat box later, or get a Littermaid box.  You can call in sick to work if you really want to, or get a different job.   And if you can't do something, 99% of the time you are choosing not to.
Obviously, before I'm flamed, I don't expect someone in a wheelchair to say "I choose not to walk"  or a deaf person to believe she chooses not to hear.   I am talking about ordinary, everyday things.
Watch your language, your use of "can't"  and also "have to"  and see how many of those absolutes really are choices.
I can get up earlier.
I can go to the gym longer.
I can eat less food.
I can be happy.
Can you?  

(crossposted to my Sparkpeople blog)

Thursday, October 15, 2009

I don't want to be skinny-fat

A lot of people don't understand why I work out so hard and so much. After all, at the end of the day, it doesn't show. I'm a 305 lb behemoth. Some people sneer at me for even trying.
Look at the fatty on her Bowflex, what is she trying to prove?
In what appears to be a total subject change, I am going to tell you about a friend I had in college. Everyone called her Squishy. She was tall, maybe 5'8", and model-thin (about a size 4). She bragged that she had never worked out in her life, never taken a walk or done anything remotely athletic that wasn't sex. She was PROUD of being that size/weight even though she ate junk food constantly and smoked like a chimney. The reason we all called her Squishy was that she had zero muscle tone. Every part of her body was flabby, especially her butt. For some reason she thought it was great that she had no muscles. (She was also tired all the time; I wonder why?) She looked great in clothes, but out of clothes--yuck.
I lost touch with her long ago, but I can only imagine that at some point her lack of exercise and terrible eating caught up with her.
My point is, I don't want to be Squishy. Squishy was what is now called "skinny fat" (look it up). A skinny-fat person wears a small size and in her clothes looks great. But she has a high body fat percentage for her size and is usually unhealthy.
My tactic is this: if I work out like a fiend now, I'm building all kinds of muscles and strength. Yeah, it's hidden under 150 lbs of fat, but it's there. Every few days another pound of fat melts away, and long before I've reached my goal weight, you will be able to see the results. Now, well, you can tell by how I walk and carry myself that I'm not 100% adipose tissue, but most people aren't inclined to analyze the walk of a fat person.
So this is a long, long term goal. I figure I'll hit my goal weight late spring of 2011. But by a year from now (fall 2010) when I'm getting close, it will be visible and noticeable.
Some days, yeah, I wonder why I should bother. Why get out of the bed. Why not lay here and eat fried chicken and drink gallons of non-diet soda. I'm fat and no one sees the hard word reflected in my body.
But I do. I feel it when I move, when I scratch an itch and under the flab is a long, sleek muscle just waiting to be revealed!
(About 15 years ago I took aerobic classes at a local studio. They had a rule that you could not use the weight lifting machines, or even use hand weights during your aerobics, until you were within 10 lbs of your goal weight! You had to weigh in to get access to the hand weights! The place is out of business now, but surely they were building a bunch of skinny-fat women. The no-weights policy was why I left because I knew it was stupid and wrong.)(crossposted to my Sparkpeople blog)
(graphic source)

Tuesday, October 13, 2009


I need new sneakers.  I somehow found a brand-new pair in the back of closet, plain white canvas hightops I bought many years ago and then never wore for whatever reason.  I decided to paint them and make them fun.  But first I tried them on.
How embarrassing.  I can't tie them.  They don't even begin to close around my ankles--not even my "good" ankle (as opposed to my edema leg).  My whole bare foot shows on either side of the tongue.  They look awful.  Even if I could wear socks (I can't because of the lymph edema) it would look stupid.
I know I can't expect to have slim beautiful legs when I weigh 305 lbs.  But I'd like to be able to wear a pair of sneakers.  Is that too much to ask?
I had a pair of those same sneakers in high school.  I used to tie the extra laces around my ankles.  Now I haven't even got enough laces to go up to the top, much less to close the sneakers!

(crossposted to my Sparkpeople blog)
(photo source)

Friday, October 09, 2009

Weight loss surgery

I want a lap band.
I am not going to get one.
I don't want a lap band because I'm lazy.  Or because I think weight loss surgery (WLS) is the easy option.  I don't think weight loss in general is easy (although people seem to think I'm doing awesome at it).
It is taking a lot of my mental/will power to keep my portions very small.   To go out to eat and order a plate of food and know that I could easily consume the whole thing without feeling bloated or sick (just guilty).  I have to ask for a box and separate my food as soon as it comes, according to the fat and calories. (I check all my food beforehand at SparkPeople so I know what the total fat/calories/etc of the whole plate is and then subdivide it as necessary.)  If I go to my mom's house I have to take tiny spoonfuls of everything and watch my husband and grandmother refill their plates over and over with yummy foods I love that are perfectly prepared.
Having a gastric band (even a Realize brand band rather than a Lap-Band) would eliminate the possibility of overeating.  Oh, I know there are tricks--eat really slowly, drink lots of fluid with food, stretch out the pouch--to overeating with any band--but I'd like the option removed entirely.
I'd like to be able to take the energy I devote to portion control and not overeating and put it toward something else.  Writing.  Art.  Exercise.   Anything but obsessing over how much food is on my plate.  Everyone who gets WLS stresses it's a TOOL not a total solution.  That's what I need, a tool to help me control overeating.  Seems like I'm balanced and understanding and a good candidate, right?   I work out, I've drastically changed my eating habits and I have lost weight on my own...
But my dietitian said today that Yale won't band anyone who weighs more than 220.  She said when I get to 220 to try again.  Why bother?   My friend that got the lap band first in my state probably weighed around 400 lbs (I didn't know her then).  And now she wouldn't be eligible!?
Doctors push gastric bypass because they make more money.  I don't want a bypass.  I have a family history of cancer and dementia.   30 years down the line, I might need to be able to take in full nutrients.  A band can be opened all the way or removed.   A bypass can't be undone.   It's not because 6 months after having WLS I want to be able to back out.   I'm thinking long term.  (Plus having my stomach thrown away like garbage is gross and offends me as does rerouting my intestines.)
But apparently long term is going to mean going all the way with just my willpower and some help from internet friends.

(image source)

Thursday, October 08, 2009

59 pounds gone...what a difference

So after a long and frustrating plateau my body did indeed catch up.  This morning I was 305.  305!   Some of you might think that's a huge number, but to me it's astonishing.  A few more pounds and I'll be back in the 200's.  
And I have dropped a category of BMI, from super obese (59.7) to severe obese (50).  Again, I'm still a fat ass, but it's better than where I started--2 lbs shy of super-super obese!
My blood pressure was holding steady for years at 130/80 and today it was 110/70.  My pulse has gone from around 94 to around 77.
I can run in the pool for over an hour and go shopping afterward without feeling out of breath and like I'm going to die.  Today I parked the car at one store and walked to two other stores without even THINKING about moving the car.  I had to cross a wide grass median strip between adjacent strip malls--they weren't in the same parking lot. Inside the stores, I walked all around without thinking about being tired.  Or actually being tired.  When I got home, I worked in my new gym, putting up spackle, for an hour.  I stopped because it was time for supper and I had to let that layer dry, not because I was tired.  I even climbed on a stool to do up by the ceiling!  Me, on a stool!
The dietitian I saw today said that I can't have a lap band until I weigh 220.  When I get down to 220 I'll have lost 146 lbs with only 70 to go.  Why bother at that point?  It's a tool I could use NOW, to get to 220 (and to 150).   Don't give me new sneakers at the finish line.  Sheesh.
cross-posted to my SparkPeople blog.